Sunday, November 15, 2009

Someone told me long ago there's a calm before the storm

The other night Mr. Canuck and I were discussing our unborn child, as we are wont to do, and he asked me what kind of person I would like our kid to be. I had to think about that one for a bit, because that's a big question, but the answer I came up with was fairly simple.

The one trait I would most like to instill in our children is simply awareness of the people around them, and awareness of how our actions affect everyone else. I believe that if we can manage to teach them this, then everything else - compassion, consideration, thoughtfulness, and just plain good manners - will fall into place fairly easily. I think that if we are conscious of the consequences of our actions, and aware that just about everything we do has an effect, no matter how small, on the people around us, then it becomes second nature to treat people the way we want to be treated. I think this quality is rather rare these days, for whatever reason, and it's incredibly important to me that my kids learn this lesson.

Now, how do I plan to teach them this? I am not telling you, NO SIREE, for two reasons. The first is that I have learned that childless people are not allowed to have any opinions on parenting. If you do have an opinion, and you dare to express it, then all the parents of the world will come down on you like a ton of bricks and inform you that you have no idea what you are talking about. The second reason is that I don't really know yet. I'm planning to just roll with it and take my opportunities as they come.

What quality do you most want your (existing or potential) children to have?


Jensboys said...

Hi :) I suppose you found my blog from the article? :)

I have always said to my kids that I understand I am not raising children, but am raising adults, if that makes sense.

My greatest wish for my kids is that they become honorable men (and now women) who follow God, are good husbands/wives and parents. They can do anything and be anything as long as they are honorable. :) so far that has worked for us.

Amanda said...

Hi, Jen! Actually, I found your blog ages ago while following random interesting links on the 'net, and I've been reading it for months now. You actually wrote me a thank-you note a while back after I chipped in a bit for Annie's surgery. :) (I'm Amanda in Toronto, if that rings any bells.) I hope she's doing all right now!

I think that is an excellent lesson to teach your kids, and for what it's worth, it sounds from your blog that you're doing an excellent job of it.

Jensboys said...

ohhh Yes of course :) THANK YOU again! Annie is doing fine -- still limping but getting better every day.

The "code name saskatchewan" threw me off :) My husband is from the states (and obviously so are the boys). Its an interesting spot to be am American in Canada. Although now Shel would say he is more Canadian than American. He might have been affected by my tirades over American politics though :)

Amanda said...

haha, I actually was confused for a minute when I saw the title of that post until I realized that you meant the actual province of Saskatchewan and not my baby! Funnily enough, the world does not, in fact, revolve around me. :)

It is indeed interesting being an American in Canada. I can't even tell you how often people have found out where I'm from and immediately want to discuss politics! I still feel very American at times, but then I've only been here for three years. Moving countries is a big change, even when they're as (relatively) similar as Canada and the US.

Thanks so much for following me! I hope I can keep you interested. :)

Renee said...

A little late to the party but this post had my FULL attention - and even prompted a loud and "AMEN SISTER" as I sit here at my desk "working" on something really important.

PLEASE hang onto that trait as your most important parental goal. It is, hands down, the most important quality you could instill - in my humble opinion. Without it, kids will have no idea where boundaries are, how to be sensitive, how to be respectful... It has a huge impact on how the rest of their adult lives will unfold! Holding down a job. Nurturing a successful relationship. Having a strong sense of personal responsibility. All of it. So, let's just say I have a friend who is a childless stepmom, morally (and circumstantially) responsible for raising a child who lacks that awareness...completely. That person would confidently tell you it is THE biggest gift you could give young lentil. For the sake of young lentil’s future and every person he/she will encounter in his/her life, stick with that one. That’s the golden ticket.